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Showing posts from January, 2022

Do You Think You're In Control Of Your Life?

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By:  Ivan Cavric You' re highly motivated to change, but you still can' t seem to stop behaving in ways you hate. You have excellent problem-solving skills, yet you can' t solve the personal ones that plague you the most. You know that if you do your job well, you' ll probably get a raise and/or a promotion, yet you go ahead and sabotage it. You know that if you' re considerate of people you' ll be well liked, yet you can' t stop being rude. You know that if you' re careful about saving and investing your money you' ll probably enjoy a prosperous retirement, yet you spend carelessly. Why can' t you figure out how to change your behavior and so change your life? Why, if what you' re doing is making you unhappy, can' t you stop doing it? When we have problems that we can' t seem to solve, many of us start thinking that we' re lazy, inexperienced, or maybe even unintelligent. We do this because it' s too scary for us to conclud

Deflate Objections In Fifteen Seconds

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By:  Ivan Cavric Does this symphony sound familiar?    You are too!  Am not!! You are TOO!  AM NOT! YOU ARE ALSO!! AM NOT!!  Familiar? It's how kids argue. I'm sure you've tried this mode of arguing decades back. Children, when pointed out that they are "xxx", tend to retaliate that their accuser is also "xxx". The accuser then balks, because people hate having their arguments thrown back at them. It's human nature and this demonstrates the Reflexivity Principle of Argumentation. By applying a belief statement back to the person asserting it, we test the applicability of that belief within an equitable context. By equitable context, I mean that what's good for the Gander should also be good for the Goose. This determines the universality of the statement. If, by throwing an argument back to its issuer, we observe a resistance, then this could indicate a presence double standards. This surely makes the argument IRRATIONAL, and NON-UNIVERSAL.

Change

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  By:  Ivan Cavric One thing in life is certain - change. Things never stay the same. If you are hoping for the status quo, then I ' m afraid you will be disappointed. Just think back to how things were five years ago and you will realize that there is so very much that ' s already different in a very short time. I ' m sure there are some of you who know people who refused to adapt to the computer age. I still know some old timers  who want to use word processors or even typewriters instead! Imagine. What is up with that?   Well, when change comes we have several options, some of which are more adaptive than others. Let ' s take a look at them. The first option is to refuse to change or adapt to any new circumstances, just like the person who still uses a word processor. These are generally people who are afraid of change. I also think that underlying that fear is the fear of being inadequate. When change requires new learning, as it often does, some people don '

Are You Feeling Paranoid?

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  By:  Ivan Cavric The following is a story recounted to me that illustrates the thoughts and feelings of paranoia.  Names have been omitted to protect the privacy of the individuals concerned.  Here is his story: I have never been a person that is constantly afraid of something going wrong with my health or of dying. In fact, I have spent most of my life without fears about health or death. My wife, on the other hand, has always been really concerned about issues relating to her health and to the health of the ones she loves most. I guess some would call her paranoid about health issues. I had never met someone so paranoid about health issues until I met my wife. It took me a few years to really understand where she was coming from when she would urge me to the doctor at the first sign of a cough or cold. I spent the first years of my married life quite frustrated by her and her constant paranoid ideas about our health and life. My wife decided to begin going to counseling to disc

An Age Old Secret For Accessing Knowledge

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 By:  Ivan Cavric Over the centuries, human beings have developed many techniques to gain access to their inner wisdom and improve learning.   One technique that many people have found very beneficial is to have an imaginary guide  that they can call on for advice and insight.   A modern variation of this technique has been developed by intelligence researcher Dr. Win Wenger and it is detailed in his book The Einstein Factor. This exercise is sometimes called Putting on the Expert s Head.    This technique enables you to access some of the enormous untapped potential that resides in the mind of every individual.  This technique can even accelerate your ability to develop a new skill.  It gives you access to parts of yourself that you are normally not aware of. The first step is to decide what knowledge or skill you would like to develop in yourself.  What are you interested in that you would like to do better?  You might wish to improve your skill at archery, portrait painting, doing

Creating a Life Worth Living - Part Three

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Published By:  Ivan Cavric Written By:  Melissa Galt Getting Launched And Letting Go In the meantime, I was launching my own design practice six months earlier than planned. I had to put some pieces inherited from Mother up for auction to gain some working capital and pay down debt. I like to think of it as she was there to help, but it was tough because they were pieces I had grown up with. I had never worked with an independent designer, so I was truly winging it. I made a lot of blunders, yet knowing I was pursuing my passion made it all possible. It was scary without a client for three months, so I stayed in catering for a year and a half. My classes were popular and soon I was seeing business growing. Referrals didn’t really kick in until the eighteenth month mark, not unusual, but it seemed forever. In the meantime, I focused on abundance, on prosperity, and fought back any doubts. The Lesson: It is our doubts that betray us, and since what we think about expands, it is critical

Creating a Life Worth Living - Part Two

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Posted By:  Ivan Cavric Written By:  Melissa Galt The Real World This vision was short lived. I moved home and after two weeks of working a retail, full-time job, I came home and declared I wanted to go to college. I found I wasn’t quite ready for the realities of a real job! Of course, I was paying rent, as the deal Mother made was that, if we moved home after college, it was no free ride. And college was a partial gift of my grandparents; the rest was banquet waitressing. I finished out the year and a half working but did apply to colleges. My heart was set on returning to the West Coast, where I was born and raised. While I was in boarding school, Mother had remarried and moved to Connecticut. I applied and got into a string of schools from UC Santa Barbara to UC Denver. She suggested Cornell University but I knew I wouldn’t get in. I had only a 3.3 average and didn’t figure that was Ivy League material. She urged and I acquiesced. Then, lo and behold, I got in. Guess I didn’t know

Creating a Life Worth Living - Part One

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Posted By:  Ivan Cavric Written By:  Melissa Galt It should have been easy. Should've, would've, could've -- those words had been the essence of my life and so many other people’s lives, too. Now I’ve learned that life really isn’t about those words at all, and it isn’t about easy. Instead, each of our lives is about will and won’t and do and don’t, and the rewards that come from taking charge of our lives. Our lives are up to us, as individuals. We are the ones in charge, whether we take that responsibility or not. So the question is, are we going to live a life by accident, a life by default, or will we have a plan, a path, a purpose? Will we end up where we want to be by intent or nowhere by accident? Will we blame others and external forces for the place we are in, or will we take charge and define by choice who we are, where we are going, and what we are doing? The choice belongs to each of us. While my life interiors have often been a mishmash of uncoordinated ele

Checklist Before Starting A Home Based Business

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By:  Ivan Cavric When you are looking for a home business opportunity, it is important to make sure that you are aware of all that you will be required to bring to the equation. This can help save you a lot of confusion and money by avoiding opportunities that require too much from you to get started. Here is a checklist of thing that you should consider before selecting a home business opportunity. Do you need to get a license to run the business? Many states require that businesses get a license before they are allowed to open. This includes home businesses in many locations. Check with your local government agencies to see what you will need to have in place to start your own home business. Do you need a zoning permit? If you have a home business opportunity that requires doing actual business with the public, you are going to need to make sure that you will not be in violation of any zoning laws. Most cities have very strict residential zoning requirements and it is not hard to vi

Is Your Food Stressing You Out?

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By:  Ivan Cavric I'm in a continual state of alert regarding so-called cures for stress, depression and anxiety. I want to be aware of any new breakthroughs that happen and I also want to be equally aware of new solutions that simply offer false hope. Snake oils and magic bullets are offered to sufferers by the dozen, offering plenty of hope but little in terms of a permanent cure.   Snake oils and magic bullets are always associated with forms of quackery. More often than not it will be dietary supplements, potions, mysticism or new age remedies such as ayurvedic medicine, acupuncture, crystals, magnets and such like. However, snake oils and magic bullets can be provided by more trusted sources such as the medical community. An antidepressant drug being the main magic bullet that is anything but.   Another far less obvious magic bullet is provided by the ubiquitous food police. In our society, it is very difficult to go through a single day without experiencing interference from t

Easy Mind Tricks

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By:  Ivan Cavric Many mind tricks are more than just tricks. They are creative techniques for tapping into the power of your mind. They entertain, but they also have more practical uses. A good example is the "pupil trick."  Look in the mirror and watch your eyes as you vividly imagine something pleasurable. It can be a beautiful scene, your favorite naked body, or anything else that will create desire in you. You'll notice your pupils getting larger almost immediately. If you practice a bit, you can make your pupils instantly larger at will. Pupils enlarge when you are aroused, interested and receptive. When you are with someone and your pupils dilate, the person you are talking to subconsciously senses your interest in them or what they are saying, and they like that. This makes it easier for them to like you, and to listen to what you suggest. You don't have to be a salesman to take advantage of this. Once you learn to control your pupil size, why not try this subl

Being Flexible

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By:  Ivan Cavric When you think about being flexible, what do you think of first? Which aspects of being flexible are important, which are essential, and which ones can you take or leave? You be the judge. In each of our lives, there will be times of joy and times of sorrow. In pain, we are born. In pain, we leave the world. Somewhere in the midst of living, growing, and understanding life in our maturity, we find ourselves seeking to find what we were born with. Innocence is precious. We really never lose it. We might for a time lose innocence, but life is too large for one perceptual being to embrace fully with the mind and the heart. Innocence comes alive the moment we realize life is beyond our control, our ability to perceive, and our emotional capacity to feel. It is here we realize that life is beyond our control and we open our hearts and mind to something greater than ourselves. Our ego finds its proper place in our lives and we shift from being the central core of life's

Are You A Time User Or A Time Waster?

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By:  Ivan Cavric If you are like me, you’ve often wished there were forty eight hours in a day instead of just twenty four. There never seems to be enough time to get everything done that you want. Since we just have about sixteen hours a day not counting sleep time, it’s important how we use the time we have.  On the average, people waste about two hours a day. This is mainly from poor planning. If a person is unorganized, they waste time trying to find things, they miss appointments, they only do one thing at a time when they could be doing two. Good time management is a major building block to success. Oftentimes, it’s not how much time we spend working but how efficiently we do the work. The key to successful time management is careful planning and setting priorities.  Plan your day, your week, and your month in advance. Know when things need to be done. A great way to “buy time” is to multi-task. Do more than one thing at a time. There are many things that do not require concentra

Ten Strategies To Kick The Procrastination Habit

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By:  Ivan Cavric A survey (by the University of Chicago) suggested that those who relish challenge are more likely to live up to ten years longer than those who spend their lives inhibited by timidity.  Trying to realize our ambitions, even if we don't always meet them, is preferable to not having the courage or motivation to take the risk. So not making any resolutions because we fear that we'll break them is having a defeatist attitude, as we allow procrastination to become an insidious habit which stops us from leading more fulfilling lives. The following offers ten strategies to kick the procrastination habit! 1. Personal values development. Take the time to find out what you really want in life, what your personal values are. Do you want more time, more money, better health, greater self esteem and confidence, more fulfilling relationships, a different career, set up a business? When we procrastinate it's often because what we are planning to do is not really aligned w

Ten Feng Shui Strategies For A Better Life

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 By:  Ivan Cavric Ever walked into a house that felt like home? Ever reminisced about the best year of your life, and wondered why everything came together for you? It could be Feng Shui.  Simply put, Feng Shui is about creating a harmonious environment. It’s the ancient Chinese Science and Art of placement, intended to improve our health, harmony, longevity, career and wealth. Pronounced, “Fung Shway”, it was a jealously guarded secret for thousands of years. Now, the benefits of Feng Shui can be enjoyed by anyone. In fact, Feng Shui is a part of everyday life for many Australian businesses, home owners, decorators, and architects. June from June Turner Designs and Lifestyles has been an expert Feng Shui practitioner for 13 years. “Feng Shui can be simple or involved – whatever you’re comfortable with. Decorate a room or buy a home that is perfect for your family.” The key is energy (or Qi “Chee”). June offers ten quick tips that can improve the flow, transformation, and containment o